The Thought of It

No, really. I don’t want to think about it. There’s so much else to think about. Why think about this? Yet. Yet, you cannot help it. You must from time to time, yes, maybe even on a daily basis, which is a wordy way of saying ‘everyday’, the thought will just come straightaway into your head, and you can’t avoid thinking about it. That’s usually the way it happens. It comes into your head. Even if you don’t want to think about it, you’re thinking about it. It just happens. It can’t be avoided.

Of course I can’t tell you what to think. That would be ungentlemanly of me. After all, who am I to presuppose that I am able to affect your thought processes? But if you were me, if you were grammatically correct I, you would certainly without fail think about it, simply because it’s there to think about, and there’s no getting around it.

It pops into your head. Like the old bad penny it keeps coming back. If you’re lucky you may not think about it when you get up in the morning and get out of bed. At least, not immediately. But soon enough you will. You can’t miss it. It’s there, lurking in the vicinity, and all you have to do is to be caught off guard for a second, and poof! it gets into your skull, and there you are thinking about it even without consciously meaning to.

It’s actually a bit scary, when you get right down to it. How it loiters there, just beyond the edge of your consciousness, waiting to pounce. The moment you relax, and all it takes is a split second, the thought slips in again. And once it gets inside your head, it is nearly impossible to get it out. It will linger, let me tell you. It will linger.

You can’t force it to go away, to clear the hell out of your head. You simply can’t. What you must do is get yourself distracted. Do something, maybe something physical, requiring the use of muscles. Physical exercise, yes, that’s one way. Don’t try working on puzzles or otherwise using your brain. That won’t do it. Don’t try turning on the television. That will only make it worse. Music sometimes helps, though. But you must play it loud. And then the neighbors might not like it.